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I'm not a graceful person. I'm not a Sunday morning or a Friday sunset. I am a Tuesday 2AM, I am gunshots muffled by a few city blocks, I am a broken window during February. My bones crack on a nightly basis. I fall from elegance with a dull thud, and I apologize for my awkward sadness. I sometimes believe that I don't belong around people, that I belong to all the leap days that didn't happen. The way light and darkness mix under my skin has become a storm. You don't see the lightning, but you hear the echoes.

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Fall Out Girl


11 November 2014
jusz checked out of Red Palm
now trippin' the roads of Mindanao
in my driver's playlist
this song was playing.




Dreamt of Dennis last night ... and now his song for me was playing ... makes me wonder ... why can't two people fall in love, same level and intensity, and stay that way, all the way. Life would have been easier. And love dignified. When there are no other concepts, no other choices. No other memories to haunt you down. No buts no what ifs. When hearts are not restless, there is one less chaos in the world ... there is peace. Why then? ...

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