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I'm not a graceful person. I'm not a Sunday morning or a Friday sunset. I am a Tuesday 2AM, I am gunshots muffled by a few city blocks, I am a broken window during February. My bones crack on a nightly basis. I fall from elegance with a dull thud, and I apologize for my awkward sadness. I sometimes believe that I don't belong around people, that I belong to all the leap days that didn't happen. The way light and darkness mix under my skin has become a storm. You don't see the lightning, but you hear the echoes.

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Dranreb*

Death is the supple suitor
That wins at last
It is a stealthy Wooing
Conducted first
By pallid innuendoes
And dim approach
But brave at last with Bulges
And a bisected Coach
It bears away it triumph
To Troth unknown
And Kindred is responsive
As Porcelain.


I wish you a happi journey,.  Something you didn't get from here.
Today was your cremation.  Start your sail.
Dranreb*



 *2 nights ago.  i went back to FB.  i texted wenggay.  confirmed.  liver cancer.  :(
he was.  boo's cousin.  boo's obsessed with dresden.  citem's a cult.  my only favorite cult.  we moved and lived like family.  just as overboard.  as dysfunctional as many.
i didn't like the circle (anymore).  and i didn't like him the way he liked me. :)
but i went on being nice and friendly to him.  he didn't have a choice.  you cannot force love.
he was graceful in accepting my decision.
he eventually found a new girl.  so i wished  him well.
he seemed happy.  he said he was.


there's always sadness in passing of people who were once part of your life.
while my faith gave me eternal life ... somewhere ... some time ...
i told bok, that i do not want to die as yet.  i wanna grow myself old
i do not mind all the lines, the sagging skin and silver hair.
i will be a groovy nana --- that's my plan.

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