... my other garden ;)

About Me

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I'm not a graceful person. I'm not a Sunday morning or a Friday sunset. I am a Tuesday 2AM, I am gunshots muffled by a few city blocks, I am a broken window during February. My bones crack on a nightly basis. I fall from elegance with a dull thud, and I apologize for my awkward sadness. I sometimes believe that I don't belong around people, that I belong to all the leap days that didn't happen. The way light and darkness mix under my skin has become a storm. You don't see the lightning, but you hear the echoes.
Showing posts with label 43. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 43. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

We were 42


My mantra, my compelling reason … Gilda Radner’s story was a bonus.  Thank you Joanna Bull for this invention … “I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.”

Gilda as expected was not  as brilliant as compared to most established and prolific novelists.  But her  spontaneity, honesty and sincerity  brings you to the exact threshold of pain, angst, mortality, her clinginess to hope, positivism, life, love, fame, and how quick she melts down when face to face with reality .   Her ovarian cancer  metastasized, and most likely she will die from it, really really soon.  Afraid to leave the life she adores and just not about ready to be given up and everything in it --- and may be,the lack of memory of it, in her life beyond, and lives left behind without her. To this day, cancer remains to massacre the human spirit.  And Gene Wilder, the love of her life, re-married, two years after her passing.  Life goes on …

I was 19 years old, when Gilda Radner, 42 years,  slipped into a coma and never woke up.  She had cancer, fought it fiercely, but eventually killed her.

I still write my pages. Impatient with an ending, a story i don't even know how to begin again. This Sunday, I will be 43.




***a no nonsense review of my recently finished, It's Always Something by Ms. Gilda Radner ... this Friday, I'm running to a bookstore nearest to my office, and grab my next cover :)

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/523469837    --- of course, it's in my goodreads :)  ... goodreads.com/irmavanta

Monday, December 31, 2012

a Gracefull 2012 and a Bucketfull 2013

Break the bread ...

Thank you my Prozac Team and for the complete year round work-up J … Facebook, Blogging, Pinterest, Cooking, Home Decorating, Books, Friends, Family, God.
Here’s for Thy sustenance, Thy faithfulness.   Thy grace and mine.   Resilience at work.  My life a work in progress.  My heart may be stubborn but you made it grateful, generous and cheerful.  
And  here’s to  that courage …  to leave, to quit, to break-away,  to break-off, to stay away, to continue, to love, to accept. 
Thank you. 


Break a leg ...




Beef up my Team @ Camp Empowerment :)



Getting closer to my online shop --- currently pondering on a few names ... and must have a new FB account for this with my current network and more ... :)


Revive my garden :)

Fix.  Explore.  Re-Start.  Finish.  Animo La Salle!!!


Try mosaic ;) (of course, with the guidance of my friend, and personal  design guru ,Wenggay) 
Erotic literature going full blast!!!
celebratin' Sophie's sweet 16

...wearing this sweet summer silhouette  in a garden of blooms
... who knows ... I might be celebratin' my 43rd summer in my little hometown ;)

A must!  LOL
will seriously pursue CSR 

... and get dirty with those pair of Wellies ;)
... bringing it to the next level.  A year to coordinate, finalize and confirm with  DOH and PNRC.


... give Giffin another chance.
... and another taste of Harris.
Ink my 3rd one.
I said this once, I ain't takin it back ...
... wanting you back in my life.  Friendship is better than love.

Amen.





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