If they asked why I didn't say goodbye ... so they did ... so I said ... these kept me ... workin' and grounded ... these days while I'm away ...
*catching up with my readings
the year's almost done and i miss the fireworks like the Fifty Fuck Ups ;-) ... i know they been a little shitty ... i didn't end up talking/writing about them ... very much like ho-hummm sex ... waking up wasted, forgetful, thankless from mechanical sex and fake orgasms!
somehow Pearl Cleage's happy (fiction) ending saved they day... why not, when reality sucks all over the place ... happy fiction quiet in a little corner is a welcome relief.
and this place of short stories from indie writers, less known but not necessarily of less meaning :) ... via my own wattpad --- http://www.wattpad.com/user/lovelace1970 --- come read my favorite from mylittlemissoddity Amelia, ... http://www.wattpad.com/14753713-love-stories-for-a-rainy-day-iii-daisy-chains-and ... when you're torn between daisies and dandelions (like I am :) ) and why some childhood hurts :-( (like mine does)
seriously, i've read and cried and gnashed my teeth on China's Cultural Revolution, The Romanovs and Rasputin.
you see i've got busy days ahead. warming up with My Hundred Lovers. My pipeline looks like this (1) Dear Teen Me, (2) Pretty in Pink (3) The Poetic Underground (4) Lang Leav (5) Finn Butler 9^) Poindexter
and my many many many online bookmarks for DIYs, home improvements, trivia list, forensic science (forensic science What The!!! lol) etc etc
too short a life huh and jusz too many books and stuff to read ...
**catching up with my writing
the birth of a porn star whose bloated decomposing cadaver lies shamelessly on a rusty dissection table, lost in some forgotten low class morgue --- a memory that thrives in the company of poets, http://loveblender.com/, and storytellers, http://lovelace1970.tumblr.com/ ... thank you tumblr for the second chance. and kirk for the many chances ;-)
All of my draft folders are getting too crowded these days. don't have enough time for all the things I want to say.
***my little enterprise
... to sustain an addiction. period. to camouflage a delusional psychosis into something useful and positive. SophieEnchanted is growing the whole nine yards but decides not to go mainstream (not yet). Her kind of Posh prefers quiet and steady. Mom's playground is her daughter's training ground.
I am a rockstar by night. And a personal shopper by day time. If you miss me, come by ... https://www.facebook.com/SophieEnchanted
Next, my cousins and I, are looking at Gensan, for a business opp. I'm excited on this one. Bikers Unite!
Next, next ... this month, definitely getting into some investment stuff, me buying a few shares from San Miguel Corporation. Col Financial Philippines is such a haven for stock dummies like me :) ... Thank God.
****Mommylicious
My daughter is 17. 18 come March. I've always been a hands-on mom. Mobile, from time to time, but still very hands-on. Many things going on with Sophie's young dear life. I have to make sure that I am with her every step of the way. Well, that OC because she's still a minor, on life apprenticeship, under Mom's tutelage ;-) ... time's fast and life's short and tricky ... too many lessons to teach and learn from.
We've talked about her coming out gig for her 18th birthday. Better than a traditional ball (which I am not a fan even as a teenager). We're working on her OJT in Portland. And sending her to grad school. Guiding her organizing event projects (thank God for CITEM for my undisputed track record and admirable work standards --- I've always been a proud CITEM alumna), homeworks for some mental gymnastics, crafting her resume for OJT, studying business processes, planning/fighting over her wardrobe etc etc
Sophie is in a journey, and I'm joining her in that.
Yet there are limitations. And conditions. Within and outside human power. As a child, I've always thought my own mother was immortal. And that her love for me, was more than enough drive for her not to die on me. I thought God would be considerate ... made my Mom an exception. Well, eventually, I was all by myself. An orphan at 36.
My blood chem looks perfect on paper but my body is telling me otherwise.. Two months ago, my breasts have gone cystic and my OB's asking for 6 months for another mammogram and breast ultrasound. I am not happy waiting around for another 6 months ... And I'm saying, I'm already 44 and I've got small ear lobes like mom's. I'm cramming and a little panicky equipping my child not just to be able to manage life on her own, but also make herself productive, and live a relatively good, meaningful life.
I recently figured in a road accident and it was a close call. Not yet.
I can't slip.
 |
| Sunday after church. Lunch with relatives. Visited my cousins' Vietnamese store @ Noel Bazaar 2014. Picked up my new Coloud Pop @ Pedro Gil. Shopped @ Robinsons Place Manila. Capped the night with some pasta dinner @ Mary Grace's. Dead meat tired but worth it. |
Page 2 THE ANSWER TO YOUR WHYS ... to be continued ...
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