chasing waterfalls

You always tell yourself to take that direction
But not really getting there.

A pragmatic woman’s instinct never fails. Never fails me. From that Saturday’s across town and Sunday’s Post. Thank you Jesus for a week of labor camp, I got to break my back, hurt my sole, and lost sleep over something else.

I got everyone standing on their heads after I left. Jomat was like a little panic when I relinquished admins of our group :( … she got worried and pissed and went thru Cecile to get to you. She told me her intentions, I begged that she wouldn’t do that. Hoping she’d get her trade, for me to cut all ties.

So I said, invisible! I asked, what that fuck is this about? Two days before Black Friday and my life officially went pitch black.

I’m gonna get the capital punishment for this. This whore’s is getting stoned to death. This witch and her major relapse. Literally, they will just kill me for this.

Of replies that don’t get replied to. Another honest message collecting dust somewhere somebody’s inbox.

So it’s not working huh, those strawberry nails, fresh coffee in my fave mug, not even that burning lavender inside my room. They just don’t work anymore. Not anymore. Nah

Alam mo ba kung gaano kasakit, even when you try to stop thinking about it, desperately in any which way you can, it’s stuck in your head and run in circles and don’t spare you even in your sleep.

… yung lalaking mahal ko, everyday is now coming home to his wife. Fulfill her dreams and build a life with her. And each night climb that bed and make love to her.

And what’s left of me is all but a broken puzzle, I still can’t put together.

Despite of all these, I only what him to be the happiest man that ever walked this earth. I know now that he is.

My tears.
They’re like waterfalls.