When I was young, all was good and happy.
As I grew, things became some kinda ... wonderful ... and fabulous ... and fantastic ... :)
Now I find myself in a bubble. My very own bubble. This is my own bubble.
Not everyone likes the fact that I am a gYpsy at heart, or that I care too much and that I am too honest and trusting to a fault. I had mood swings even before reaching middle age. So I can be your sweet pixie one moment, and a really bad, angry witch in a blink of an eye.
I was raised to be regular burger, I understand that. But even as a little girl I knew I was gonna be Big Mac :). Teehah … I changed my religion, declared independence at 23, moved in my boyfriend and got pregnant without a wedding in my head, got my education and made colors fly in school, traveled the world, did a good honest job in government for twenny years, packed my suitcase when it was time to go, survived losses of loved ones’ passing, survived heartbreaks from lovers and friends, survived crises … financial, emotional and what have you. I made it through so many storms in life, and I dunno how and why, but those moments I always feel God’s hands touching my face. I breath life the next day and still adoring afternoon rains. I wake up kissing my daughter goodbye as I head for work. I look forward on Fridays, dinner and drink with friends, I look forward for weekends, jusz me and my little girl. I want better days with GMA (I continue to talk to God about that … we’re sorta debating about it until this day) ... and true love (hey, why not, who knows one day, ayt?).
… you know there are still many many things I can’t and don’t want to do :) … like cook (but I can fancy you with my cutlery … and my linens … the scent of hot choc’late all over my kitchen) … am not good at laundry but I can squeaky clean your bath or decorate the entire house, and ohhh I am very very poor with money (when I get rich I promise to hire my kumares Jena and Gigi as my financial and investment consultants … I will give them all my dinero to manage (because I trust them so fully with all my heart) and let them give me a stipend (huge amount!) for all the things I need … and all the things I ♥) . I don’t want to go to church until fanatics start getting real with life and God (I am God’s favorite child, I can go straight to him, any time , any where). It ‘s hard to quit my vices (even if I want to) … like smoke arrgggh … say bad words (especially when I mean them) …. write (… with less honesty … what’s wrong with "honesty overdose" in the first place) ... and not compromise ( people, things, stuff I value greatly) … and this wuV (our anakish Jonah bought me a choc’late cake last Monday … the traditional blowing …I made the same old wish .. she and Wenggay jusz couldn't believe it).
I am in this bubble for 40 summers. It’s actually not complicated. It’s unique. Special.
Ama wanna tell God (something He already knows) … this bubble He gave me ... I so love it. I hope He gives me another 40 years with it :).
... my other garden ;)
About Me
- Irma
- I'm not a graceful person. I'm not a Sunday morning or a Friday sunset. I am a Tuesday 2AM, I am gunshots muffled by a few city blocks, I am a broken window during February. My bones crack on a nightly basis. I fall from elegance with a dull thud, and I apologize for my awkward sadness. I sometimes believe that I don't belong around people, that I belong to all the leap days that didn't happen. The way light and darkness mix under my skin has become a storm. You don't see the lightning, but you hear the echoes.
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